A Conversation With Stephen King

Last week I got to cross a big item off the Bucket List. One that I never really thought would get crossed off, so I actually had forgotten about it until the opportunity presented itself in crazy, random sort of happenstance way.

Stephen King was in Dallas last week promoting his new novel 11/22/63 (about a guy who goes back in time to try to stop the assassination of JFK), and at the last minute I found myself a ticket to attend. It was a live interview hosted by journalist Lee Cullom, who sounded a lot like Barbra Walters with a head cold.

So I'm sitting in the second balcony at the Majestic Theater about 3 rows from the back and out walks Mr. King on to the small stage. This was an incredible, pinch-me-am-I-dreaming? moment. My early teenage years were cram packed with Stephen King novels. I've seen all of his book-turned-movies. I watched The Shining repetitively as a kid and freaked out when I learned it was a real hotel. But on top of that, I look to Stephen King as a sort of mentor on my Path to Publication. I've read his book On Writing several times and I always find a little pearl of wisdom that I hadn't found before, and it's always just enough to keep me going.

The interview was perfection.

The first thing Mr. King says to the audience is "You know, I was just going over insurance plans for car insurance, and I came across an interesting statistic. 50% of people who attend and event - like this one - forget to lock their cars. So...anyone could climb in the back and hide there."

The audience laughed, pleased that their favorite horror writer was just as creepy as they'd hoped.

"Everyone laughs when they're all together," he continued, "But sooner or later...you're going to be alone."

Loved. It.

The of course discussed the new novel and the research that went into it, but they also talked about some really off-the-wall stuff that had nothing to do with anything. For example, Stephen King has just finished a series with Marvel called American Vampire (yay!) so Lee the journalist asked Mr. King what his favorite comic books were.

"I've always preferred Batman over Superman. One reason is because Batman is like a real guy. But the other thing is...well, I've never been able to understand how Superman and Lois Lane would have sex."

Queue audience laughter and slightly frightened journalist.

"Because, I mean...okay, when Superman goes to the bathroom that has got to be like the shit of steel. Right? And when he needs to blow his nose, what does he blow his nose on? You see where I'm going with this..."

As everyone, myself included, was laughing hysterically and the journalist was covering her face trying to regain composure, I thought to myself - "This is awesome. That totally sounds like a conversation I would have with one of my friends!"

Stephen King also talked about his experience working with Michael Jackson on a music video. I personally don't know what video they're talking about and Mr. King couldn't even remember the song it was before, but he said it ended up being like "Son of Thriller."  Anyway, the story goes like this:

Mr. King was working on the set of The Stand when his assistant told him he had a phone call. Mr. King said, "I'm kind of busy. Take a message."

To which the assistant responded very excitedly, "But it's Michael Jackson."

Mr. King said, "Alright, I'm curious." So he took the call.

According to him, he heard a very high pitched voice say "Stephen, I want to make the scariest music video anyone has ever seen. Will you help me do it?"

Mr. King answered in an equally high pitched voice, "Okay Michael."

He said he never worked face to face with Michael and never got to meet him; his work was all more behind the scenes kind of stuff. Then, several months after Mr.King had finished his part of the video Michael Jackson called his house in Maine. Mr. King wasn't there but his wife had answered and gave Michael the number where her husband could be reached.

5 minutes later, Michael Jackson calls back and he is weeping. "I'm so sorry," he said. "When you gave me the number I didn't have a pen so I wrote it out in the carpet, and when I went to dial the number the carpet had sprung back up!"

I had tears in my eyes. I mean, who does that??

"So," said Stephen King, "My working experience with Michael Jackson was very brief, and very weird."

I didn't get to meet Stephen King but I got to be in the same room with him and see him "in real life" and that was good enough for me. The evening did not disappoint. I got to hear the greatest story I had ever heard in my life about Michael Jackson.

"It's not nice to laugh at someone who has passed away," Stephen King scolded us. "But let's do it anyway!"

Parentheses

I know, I know. It has been 2 weeks since my last post and I've gotten all off my schedule and I left you hanging with a "To be continued..." last time. 

I'm sorry.

I haven't had time/been able to write anything because I have been in the process of moving the last two weeks. And I have been pulling 9 to 11 hour days at work which have left me completely brain fried. I haven't been able to write anything at all the last couple weeks. Partly because of the time management issue and partly because my computer had been hidden among a towering inferno of boxes. I mean, I just found my bath towels five minutes ago. 

I am going to make it my number one goal this week to get back on the blogging schedule. I've missed it terribly. And I have so much to share with you!

But that will have to wait. Right now I'm sweaty and tired and still shaking the dirt out of my hair from Fun Fun Fun Fest in Austin over the weekend. I'm drinking a delightfully chilled Moscato, and then taking a much needed shower and getting some much needed shut-eye. 

More posts to come very soon, I promise!

As always, thanks for reading! =)

OMG Y'all (part 1)

This last weekend I drove out to Lubbock, TX to visit my very good friend Lindsey. There's nothing really remarkable about that in itself. Just a 5 and a half hour drive cross-country to see an old friend.

Except that I'm directionally challenged.

It should have been a straight shot with one turn. One turn. I zigged when I should have zagged.

So there I am, the only car on a pitch black, two-lane highway with only the moon and big empty cotton fields keeping me company, no clue where I'm at and my cell phone won't work because I'm out of range. Not. Cool. And I passed by a restaurant named The Feed Bag located directly across from a dead skunk. Because that's appetizing.

I'm going in and out of spotty coverage when Lindsey finally calls me to ask where I'm at.

"I don't know," I groan. "The last form of civilization I saw was a place called Jean."

"Bahahaha! Have you gone through Olney yet? It's the  home of the One Armed Dove Hunt."

"Maybe...I'm not sure. There's nothing out here. Hold on...is that? OH MY GOD. There is a grim reaper, on stilts in the middle of the street!"

That's right. Let me say that again, this time with emphasis. There was a GRIM REAPER on STILTS in the MIDDLE OF THE STREET.

Oh, Sweet Jesus, what new hell is this?  Thought I.

I somehow made it past the grim reaper and his scythe without taking him or anyone else out as I drove by, and continued on into the black nothingness that is West Texas. A few hours later and I was all alone again with no cell service and no clue where I was. I remembered that I had a map in my glove box so I pulled over to the side and parked in front of about 5 deer.

"Alright, it's cool. I am not lost. I got this." I told myself as I rummaged through my glove box. I found my proof of insurance, some tissues and a gun, but no map.

"Eff my life."

I sat back in my seat and looked out over my steering wheel. The deer stood there blinking at me as if they were saying "Who doesn't carry a map with them? Stupid."

"I'm not the stupid one. You're the ones eating grass on the side of a highway that doesn't even have a shoulder.Stupids."

I figured the best thing to do was to just keep going. I would have to get reception again at some point. A couple hours later and I could no longer pronounce the names of the towns coming up. This is when I started to get worried again. I pulled over at an Allsup's in Quanah to buy a map.

I found a map of Texas (now 40% larger!) and spread that bad boy out right there in the store. I traced from where I had left to where I was supposed to have gone and then started looking all around for Quanah. It took me several seconds. My eyes drifted up towards the Oklahoma boarder. I saw it.

"You have got to be kidding me."

I was about a quarter-inch from Oklahoma.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Texas geography I am including this map so that you can better appreciate my dismay.

This is where I was supposed to go

This is where I went

I took a moment, folded that map up and stood in line behind a girl in a shirt that said "Boogie Woogie Mamacita" with jeans that were about two sizes too small, and then back tracked a good 35 miles to find a highway that would take me to Lubbock.

I left DFW at 5:00pm Friday. I should have arrived at Lubbock at 10:30 pm Friday. I actually got there at 1:45 am Saturday.

What a disaster.

Once I finally got there, my weekend was great. I went to a corn field maze shaped like Buddy Holly, got my hair did and got to have a lot of laughs with one of my very good friends.

I could have gotten angry and stressed out about being lost - and if I'd ended up in another state I probably would have been. But I kept my cool and chose to just accept it. Some of the best stories I've ever come away with are from times that I've gotten lost.

I actually think it's kind of nice that even in these times where technology is everywhere and you can trace where people are just by knowing their phone number, it is still possible to be completely alone and get completely lost in a true middle of nowhere. I actually felt at ease in the blank spaces of the map; with just me and the moon.
Thanks for reading! =)

(This is just what happened on the way to Lubbock. Come back later to read about what actually happened in Lubbock)